Illustration for She Walks in Beauty-parody

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Parody on Byron’s She Walks In Beauty

She walks in beauty, nipt and tuck’t Flabs spread all o’er, surgeons art Ne’r more meet than in Mary Plukket, And she is out to steal my heart. Walk on by, walk on Mary Pluckket I shall one day pledge my heart. 2. One more lipo-suction would have Marred my Mary beyond repair; My eternal [...]

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A parody on King Lear’s ‘Blow, Winds’ speech

Ac III, sc-ii (lines 1-24) Spam! Spam! Delete them all! Out! Out! You cowardly poltroons stop And think what you cut and paste does no good! Your sulphurous and beguiling offer Clog my inbox! And a spam filter –seems what Stops you on tracks ! And almighty Jove here Comes an offer- for spam filter [...]

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Omar Khayyam -Updated

The Rubaiyat-parody quatrain #2 Seeking that old thrill that begins anew I heard a cry within, ‘I need a shot!’ ‘Yeah with a monkey on my back,’ a fix Is all needed to please the slave driver. benny

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A Parody on Byron

Christmas At Heathrow© So we’ll take no more a Boeing Even if we want to, Though the heart be, oh, a- winging And the hearth be still ablaze. For the sleet and snow falling Has the runway out of sight- So Christmas at Heathrow is Our sad plight this year. Though the ticket was all [...]

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A Parody on Wordsworth

My Heart Leaps Up My heart leaps up when I behold A porn-site on the web: So was it in postcards of old; So it is now I am so old; So be it when I shall behold All in the web! What I seek shall never come true And I could wish a thought [...]

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‘On first looking into Chapman’s Homer’-a parody

Much have I pined in the paperwork, And many accounts and books tallied; Round many expense accounts have I rallied And found how Corporate heads work. Oft of one name in particular I shirk To cite among many follies in my work: Yet did I never breathe or e’en bark Till I saw Madoff scheme [...]

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A Parody on Swinburne

Value Added Days From too much love of texting, From spams and bots set free; We thank with brief thanksgiving Whatever info we access, We are glut with useless sites That make even a chat with man In real time, and of any news Add value to time spent. (The Garden of Proserpine-Swinburne) benny

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Rubaiyat-XI

A Parody on the famous lines beginning with ‘Here with a Loaf of bread…. Here with a kindle O, beneath the Sun A word or two from my love exchanged- She has her Kindle too; let Khayyam Find some other meter and rhyme. benny

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Storytime: the tale of the Bull and the Ass

The Tale of the Bull and the Ass © There was a merchant in Mosul and he had a wife by name Zainaba. She loved him to distraction. She wanted to engage him at all hours in conversation. While in the middle of crossword puzzle she was sure to ask whatever popped in her mind. [...]

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