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Posts Tagged ‘unemployment’

I used to fish whenever I had a chance. I have fished in the deep sea and in the canal behind my house whenever I had leisure and boy o boy! trouts love an angler like me. When they see my angle they know I am fishing for compliments.
No fear dearies! Had I been been less queasy about scaling or gutting myself I would have. Never mind, ethical living is what the modern world has come to.
Like Marx I thought hunting elephants in my pajamas was a good idea. Had I das Kapital I could have invested in a Winchester. In these cash strapped times one has to go with the flow and not get fancy ideas of hunting. Already I have been standing in the line for five hours and the employment is hard to come by. I hunted the other day for an employer who had his heart on the right side. I found one and he was eager to hire me without even checking my resume.
I did not have the heart to take the offer. ‘The hours are killing,’ said he,’no coffee breaks or no golden handshake.’
‘O I never pause for coffee. Except when I want to breathe.’ He took out his mobile, computed the number of pauses and giving me a dirty look, he said I was too expensive for him.
‘But I am taking next to nothing for 70 hour a week’, I spluttered. He shook his head and left me on the kerb. For the first time in my life my grin fell all askew and milk of human kindness somewhat curdled. I decided,’No more bright ideas to find a job except through the proper channel’.
Here you see I am all for ethical living. No jumping the queue or catching the media moghul Rupert Murdoch with a pie.
I intend to be a slave to ethical living. But economic slavery is alive and kicking, I know from the number of fellas who have been ass-kicked from 82 St to 43 St.There they live and have not dared to get up and go.It would fit well, like in somewhat variant version of the Sleeping Beauty, waiting for an employer in a shining armor to say the magic words,’You are hired!’
Ethical living is still alive. Ethics, forget it!
benny

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What America has, in the recent times, achieved by politics spells trouble if one goes by enemployment figures. The confrontation between the GOP controlled House and Democratic-controlled Senate was fought on bi-partisan spirit and not for the good of the nation. The government defaulting on its debts was barely avoided but its credit triple rating fell.
‘The job market is even worse than the 9.1 percent unemployment rate suggests.
America’s 14 million unemployed aren’t competing just with each other. They must also contend with 8.8 million other people not counted as unemployed — part-timers who want full-time work.
When consumer demand picks up, companies will likely boost the hours of their part-timers before they add jobs, economists say. It means they have room to expand without hiring.
And the unemployed will face another source of competition once the economy improves: Roughly 2.6 million people who aren’t counted as unemployed because they’ve stopped looking for work. Once they start looking again, they’ll be classified as unemployed. And the unemployment rate could rise’.( 4th Sept- AP News the Daily Caller)
The only reason the Founding Fathers of the nation made their hard earned liberty secure was on capitalism. But politics of the skunks made it crapitalism. Here we see crapitalism at its best.
The politicians are all have their eyes on the 1912. So Democrats and Republicans did not want to look that they compromised on their principles and so cuts in spending had to be be applied for all its worth. Then only, so it seems to me, one party can give tax breaks for the super rich that keep the party relevant. ‘Kickbacks’ as a term in the Capitol Hill means not to kick a good thing that makes their tea party as cosy as can be.
Since politicians are all explaining ‘theology’ as a synonym for politics these days let me quote words of Jesus. ‘You have the poor with you always.’ As I edit this I realize the Labor days are here. Those who are taking time out resting from their labors think of who cannot rest because they have lost their labor from the day one.
The Republican party is full of able candidates who are for making a moral stand even in a political meeting. ‘You have the poor because we cannot go against the word.’
I rest my case.
benny

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Number of Jobs I blew Away

The first was for the male lead In Tarzan, the Son of A Gun. I came into the walk in interview. I came walking all right but my bowlegs somehow didn’t make it to the screen test room.

2.

There was a vacancy I could have filled in nicely. The job required a keen eye and attention to detail. So I sent a resume in which I mentioned all those accomplishments that the employers could not have verified.

For instance:

“I am the most talented employee my company has ever had before it went into liquifaction.

“I am the best and most awesome employee in Pudukottai. “

* “My least client called me allmost perfect emplyee.” Unfortunately they could pick out the typos and mistakes.

There were more to come.

Now my only chance to land a job depends on the criterion:’Who has the most experience in being refused?” In that department my resume shall beat the rest, no doubt.

benny

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The day I turned 18 my father called me to his study and said I was on my own. My parents wanted me to go and find a job. But jobs that came were not what exactly I was after.
So after a long search I became my own boss. I have this sign in front of my seat: the buck stops here.
At the end of the day no bucks stopped but two nickels.  That will do.
You see how one learns to downsize one’s expectations?

benny

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One homeless person to another: “I thought of turning a new leaf; but the winter set in early.”

The other: “I was so low on the job market.  so I took a couple of degrees. But now I am overqualified for the jobs available”.

2.

At a Hallow’n party

one in the costume of  Headless Horseman,  “I am not sticking my neck out for any one.”

His companion in a Dracula dress: ” Ichabod, you lost your head and I my dentures. We will take off from there during the party. Remember we are here for a good time.”

benny

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