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Posts Tagged ‘Westminster’

Benjamin Disraeli(1804-1881) the outsider by sheer will and his wit made to the top. On his way he had to demolish quite a few and cut many to size.
He was a dangerous adversary in a verbal duel.
Here are some samples:
on Sir. Robert Peel
‘The Rt. Hon’ble Gentleman’s smile is like the silver fittings on a coffin’.
ii.
‘The Rt.Hon’ble Gentleman is reminiscent of a poker. The only difference is that a poker gives off occasional signs of warmth’.
On Lord John Russell who represented Liberals:
If a traveler were informed that such a man was the Leader of the House of Commons, he might begin to comprehend how the Egyptians worshiped an insect.’
On William Ewart Gladstone:
He has not a single redeeming defect.’
ii
He made his conscience not his guide but his accomplice.’
iii
‘He was essentially a prig, and among prigs there is a freemasonry which never fails. All the prigs spoke of him as the coming man.’
On Daniel O’Connell:
‘…a systematic liar and a beggarly cheat; a swindler and a poltroon… He has committed every crime that does not require courage.’
There was dyspeptic philosopher who was impotent but when his bile was up he could bite with especial venom.
Thomas Carlyle (1795-1881) on one occasion cried out against Disraeli thus:‘How long will John Bull allow this absurd monkey to dance on his chest?’
benny

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Once when David Lloyd George was speaking in the House of Commons, a member of the opposition kept on interrupting him.’Give him dynamite,’ one of his supporters urged. To which the Welsh Wizard
replied:‘Why should I waste ammunition when insect powder would do as well?’
2.
The last great speech of David Lloyd was made after the debacle in the Norwegian campaign, in the early days of WWII. On this occasion Churchill chose to defend the Chamberlain government. Lloyd George turned to him and said,’My Rt. Hon’ble friend should not convert himself into an air raid shelter to prevent the splinters of public opinion hitting his new-found friends.
3.
Once in a debate in the House, on being scoffed at by Daniel O’Connell for being a Jew, Disraeli retorted: ’Yes, I am a Jew when the ancestors of the Rt. Hon’ble Gentleman were brutal savage in an unknown world, when mine were priests in the Temple of Solomon.’
4. While defending his first budget, Satyamurthy’s interruptions prompted the Finance Minister,Sir James Grigg to say thus:’ The Hon’ble member must face ugly facts.’
Satyamurthy who was seated just opposite to the Minister shot back ‘That’s what I am doing here day by day.’ This felicitous remark brought laughter from all including Sir. James Grigg.
benny

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‘For The Apparel Oft Proclaims the Man’

Kier Hardy,(1856-1815) first Socialist Member of Parliament on the first day of entering the House of Commons was stopped by the police man at the gate. Looking at the figure in his cloth-cap the guard asked:’ Are you working here?’

‘Yes,’ replied Hardie who was indeed a Lancashire miner.

‘On the roof?’

‘No,’ replied the M.P,’On the floor.’

2.

Zachary Taylor(1784-1850) was known as ‘Old Rough and Ready’ for his short and dumpy figure made all the more worse by his thick neck and old battered straw hat that he always sported. He was the least military looking general,- and he looked more a codger that he was mistaken by a newly appointed lieutenant from the West Point.

He mistook him for a camp follower and addressed him as ‘say old codger.’

Later when he realized his mistake he hastened to the general to make amends. Accepting his apology Zachary Taylor said with a smile,’Never judge a stranger by his clothes.’

3.

William Rufus(1087-1100) who reigned as William II had notions of dressing in extraordinary clothes as befitting his majesty. One morning while putting on his new boots he asked his chamberlain what they cost.

He replied,’Three shillings.’ The king shouted,’You son of a whore, how long has the king worn boots so petty a price?’He added,’Go bring me a pair worth a mark of silver.’

The chamberlain went and brought a much cheaper pair. When asked of the price he replied that it cost as much he was allowed. He also added that it suited his majesty handsomely. His answer pacified the king who let his chamberlain a free hand to choose his clothes. Not only he pleased the king thereby he also lined his pocket handsomely.

Benny

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