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Archive for the ‘parodies’ Category

A Draft Dodger’s Song
The war gets too scary, for my fears are real, (I will not serve)
I have got excuse, for my bone spur foolproof
I never bother with duty that I hate
That is why I am still alive
I  cannot walk miles what with blacks and kikes,
Vi-et-nam theatre is too bloody for me
Like  many other who hate what I hate:
That is why I am still alive.
McCaine likes to be hero, so army makes sense.
Wont serve the cause , but salute the flag
And I definitely won’t fire or crawl with the rest of cadets (Thank-you)
That’s why I am still alive
benny
(original)
the lady is a tramp
She gets too hungry, for dinner at eight (I am starving)
She loves the theater, but she never comes late
I never bother, with people that I hate
That’s why this chick is a tramp
She doesn’t like crap games, with barons and earls
Won’t go to Harlem, in ermines and pearls
And I definitely won’t dish out dirt, with the rest of those girls (Thank-you)
That’s why the lady is a tramp
I love the free, fresh wind in my hair
Life without care, oh I’m so broke, it’s old
I hate California, it’s crowded and damp
That’s why the lady is a tramp (I am a tramp)
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Everybody, ol’ Nick’s in town

He’s got a scythe and a bag that doesn’t say much:

Well, let the good times roll, let the good times roll
I don’t care if you’re young or old

Mown together let the Grim Reepah

Have some fun on the side!

Get together, let the good time roll

Well, it aint buddy it is a quaint thing to do

While jiving and rollin’ Nick let him go,go, go

And let the good times roll, let the good times roll
I don’t care if you’re young or old

Mown together let the Grim Reepah

Have some fun too.

 

Well, I like a little coffee and I like a little tea
But stir-it, spike it Ol-Nick’s brew is the thing for me
And let the good times roll, let the good times roll
I don’t care if you’re young or old
Get together, let the good time roll

Yeah!

Alright now let’s go!
Let it roll, let it roll, all night long
Let it roll, let it roll, all night long
Let it roll, let it roll, all night long
Let it roll, let it roll, all night long
I don’t care if you’re young or old
Get together, let the good time roll
Now let’s go!
Let it roll, let it roll, all night long

benny

(Ack: Jerry Lee Lewis lyrics)

 

 

 

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Oh when the nukes /go dropping in

Oh when the nukes /go dropping in

Lord I want to be elsewhere, oh please

When the missiles go overhead

Oh then go shrieks! Fake news non stop

Oh then go shrieks! Fake news non stop

Oh, when the stars fall from the sky

Oh, when the stars fall from the sky

Ah-la-ba-ma to Al-ber-tah

Is his-to-ry-Aint it sad?

Oh, when the moon turns red with blood

Oh, when the moon turns red with blood

Lord I want to fly home by you

Oh when the fools rip the world apart

I want to lay my head and sleep!

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Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall

Humpty Dumpty said: raise this wall

But down south, over the border

Holle’ed they: With gringo no palaver!

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O say can you see, by the mists rising fast

Some one strutting some one torching Shylock’s last rest place,

You know who with hate and fear in lather cast

Now dare desecrate graves, is it against his race

Or the unmanly vice, what his elders improv’d

Having nothing else to impart, -hate is rude,

But with that rallying battle-cry rises hate wave

O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

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The Cloths of heaven

 

Had I the gumption I would pass for real

Scholar in mortar-board, you may well

Believe yonder yokel is Jackass

Of first rate mind, but given up, yes

His higher calling for hard labour :

But I being born with circumstance

I have no choice but walk the line, sir:

My learning is’nt what I intend practise.

benny

 

 

Had I the heaven’s embroidered cloths,

Enwrought with golden and silver light,

The blue and the dim and the dark cloths

Of night and light and the half-light;

I would spread the cloths under your feet:

But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

WB Yeats

 

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Wall Street Blues

Westmoreland: O that we have the dope

But one fool perchance can undo all these boodle

By idle talk, mind you sirs!

Harry: How do you then we go

About or conceal from the Board, tell me.

If we are thick as thieves, we act as one

To do our country loss; and if we run

We abscond with lock stock and barrel, not a dime

Left behind. Not a word, to the Press,we have ‘t all.

By Jove, I am not sweating for gold,

Nor care I whose pension funds doth feed me;

Such outward things are for others to worry.

But if it be a sin to covet wealth,

I am the most offending soul alive….

benny

Original version

WESTMORELAND. O that we now had here

But one ten thousand of those men in England

That do no work to-day!

KING. What’s he that wishes so?

My cousin Westmoreland? No, my fair cousin;

If we are mark’d to die, we are enow

To do our country loss; and if to live,

The fewer men, the greater share of honour.

God’s will! I pray thee, wish not one man more.

By Jove, I am not covetous for gold,

Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost;

It yearns me not if men my garments wear;

Such outward things dwell not in my desires.

But if it be a sin to covet honour,

I am the most offending soul alive.

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