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Archive for the ‘parody’ Category

‘Bama

ACT I

SCENE I. The White House. The Rose Garden

FRANCISCO at his post. Enter to him BERNARDO

BERNARDO

Who’s there?

FRANCISCO

Nay, answer me: were you on watch yesterday?

BERNARDO

Long live the Prez!

FRANCISCO

Bernardo?

BERNARDO

He.

FRANCISCO

You almost got yourself screwed up.

BERNARDO

‘Tis now struck twelve; no intruder, Francisco.

FRANCISCO

For this relief much thanks: ’tis bitter cold,

And I am sick at heart.

BERNARDO

Have you had quiet guard?

FRANCISCO

Not a mouse stirring.

BERNARDO

Well, good night.

If you do meet Horatio and Marcellus,

The rivals of my watch, bid them make haste.

FRANCISCO

I think I hear them. Stand, ho! Who’s there?

Enter HORATIO and MARCELLUS

HORATIO

Friends to this ground.

MARCELLUS

And liegemen to the Prez.

FRANCISCO

Give you good night.

MARCELLUS

O, farewell, honest soldier:

Who hath relieved you?

FRANCISCO

Bernardo has my place.

Give you good night.

Exit

MARCELLUS

Holla! Bernardo!

BERNARDO

Say,

What, is Horatio there?

HORATIO

A piece of him.

BERNARDO

Welcome, Horatio: welcome, good Marcellus.

MARCELLUS

What, has this thing appear’d again to-night?

BERNARDO

I have seen nothing.

HORATIO

Well, sit we down,

And let us hear Bernardo speak of this.

BERNARDO

Last night of all,

He scal’d the north fence of the House, Yes he

Did not cease though I did ask his steps freeze

And raise hands in abject surrender wait

For frisk and search,-

Enter Ghost

MARCELLUS

Peace, break thee off; look, where it comes again!

BERNARDO

In the same figure, like Andrew Jackson.

MARCELLUS

Thou art a scholar; speak to it, Horatio.

BERNARDO

Looks it not like A J? mark it, Horatio.

HORATIO

Most like: I must speak less scholarly then .

BERNARDO

It would be spoke to.

MARCELLUS

Question it, Horatio.

HORATIO

What art thou that usurp’st this time of night,

Together with that fair and warlike form

By which the native Indians were struck dumb

And that threw the Bankers on the east

in apoplectic rage, speak!

MARCELLUS

It is offended.

BERNARDO

See, it stalks away!

HORATIO

Stay! speak, speak! I charge thee, speak!

Exit Ghost and Renters

Here is a tip worth two cents,

Fellow Americans and leige men

to your Chief, name of the intruder

Is Omar Gonzalez.

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I can be funny in a maudlin way

Don’t mean to but it’s sad;

Birds got it damn right their day full of songs

My shouldn’t we sing instead?

I’m stuck up all the day

Fed up with my lot

But I know what I have: Look at what I got

I got rhythm, I got music

And twinkle toes!

Who could ask for anything more?

I’ve got starlight I’ve got the mood

Who could ask for anything more?

Old Man Trouble, I don’t mind him

He can’t hear a word I say

I’ve got starlight, I’ve got sweet dreams,

Sock it to him,

maybe he’ll get it in the end.

music and lyrics by George and Ira Gershwin

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I’ve been away from you a long time.


I never thought I’d miss you so.

Somehow I feel this time it’s real


White House I long to be.


The birds are singin’,

Ann is a-wingin’ 


The Air Force One ready for take off

I know that I shall look you up folks


Rominee, You’ve arrived.

Chorus:


Rominee,


How I love my ole Pappy


My dear old Rominee!



I’d give them an offer

That they can’t refuse!

Even Tagg want a shot at peace

Waitin’ for me, prayin’ for me

Rally round Rominee!

The folks up north won’t see me cringe

When ticker tape parade go by

Rominee, Rominee

Rominee, Rominee

I love my congregation (repeat)

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Anita:

His-pan-ico!

By blood Lat-ino

It is OK in US of A!

Always there is a damn way

Always there are bills to pay

And the hellsapoppin!

But don’t you worry

And the sunlight streaming

And the natives steaming

Cool when the drug mules arrive

Hispanico!

By blood Latino

It is OK in US of A

girls:

I like to be in US of A

My credit always good at gunpoint

Man at the end gets the hint- pronto!

Bernardo

For a small fee in US of A

Anita

A shiv is what gets you discount

Bernardo

One look at us and they charge twice

Rosalio

But two fall when Chico whips his rod

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Scotch, make it double, Joe while you are at it-

My thirst is not what we need concern now

I cadge freely your drinks, well what of it?

2.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light-

Nothing good can come out of it I know

Unless with booze wash this red-hot gullet.

3

I shall hold my life a ransom to thirst:

Dare not go gentle into night somehow

Like whipt cur on the run,- but first things first ,-

4

Sweet is the day but will live to regret:

Youth who lay hope more than day shall allow

Has nothing left but golden youth misspent

5.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight,

Time the bloody hound making a meal of

Hope, they ne’r even had a chance at it.

6.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light:

Life was a holy grail to seek and now

I know my life from youth up was mis-hit

Curse, bless, Oh does it matter in the least?

benny

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Parody on the Balcony Scene Act 2sc.ii-

But soft what light through yonder window breaks…

Medusa! your hair is all a-tumble, Fie!

Had you wash’d and tied your hair as before

My love would have grown wings at mere mention

Of your name and fallen at feet, a fool

Faint for love,- Oh Medusa strange is your head

(More terror I have never felt till now -)

How strange that your tresses breathe pestilence,

Are they horrid vipers dining on lice?

Tell me but wait! I feel, Oh something strange

Your eyes pierce with their laser points

And it is not honey your serpent tongue drips:

Ay me! With venom ting’d I’m all aflutter

My heart winds down and the throat closes in.

I am not a fool for love Oh Medusa

I am stone dead and am consign’d to hellfire!

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Let me not coin new meaning to words

Or alter their sense for mere badinage:

Broken pediments may add grace to facades

But words void of wit and sense are BeauNash

Playing dandy among a mournful wake.

I have miscalled pediments impediments

And Paul Bremer for Beau Brummel, a rake.

Words are a good man’s trusted implements-

In music chords do allow inversion

But mix up fundament for aliment

another might think it as some perversion,

If in need of vigor take supplement.

But if you are not Dam Malaprop

Treat words and their sense as walk on tight rope.

benny

Original Version:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

Admit impediments. Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove:

O no; it is an ever-fixed mark,

That looks on tempests, and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.

Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

Within his bending sickle’s compass come;

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

   If this be error and upon me proved,

   I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

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