Archive for the ‘The Bard parodied’ Category

Perfidious Albion


No deal, oh not much time! Either way Brexit

Whether we settle in the end  a back stop

Or hard,- where the border takes us, I wonder-

A border is a border for disaster

I shall dump Irish question straightway-

EU can have Dublin solve this one

So my promise I keep to do or die:

Brexit is over with! -’tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wished! To speak one thing,

And do another is Prime Ministerial

So easy with no conscience prick

I do but dying is for another.



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Ac.1 Sc.4 lines:800-815

(The Duke of Albany’s Palace)

Sheikh al-Biruni:

my Lord, I am guiltless, as I am ignorant

Of what mischief I caus’d.



It may be so, Oh Sheikh

Hear O hear, hear Lord of three worlds

Suspend thy purpose, if thou didst intend

To make this kingdom fruitful.

Into her wealth convey sterility;

Dry up her wells, dry up in their outflow;

And from her palm fringed soil never spring

A tribe to honour her! If she must teem,

Create her child a zero, that he may live

And be a bone ever stuck in her gullet,

Let he stamp wrinkles in her brow of youth,

And cadent tears cause mothers to mourn:

For the house of bandits dispenses law and

Has done away the tender greens with the sere;

With lashings and highhandedness of impiety

Vile are the guardians of stone and hollow word.

Yet police they highways and by ways

Their moral purpose null, and void the article of law :

Oh hear let them be crushed under the weight

of sins thy have hoisted on all

With tainted bribes have devil’s service done.

Hear, O hear the Lord of three worlds

Let her learn her lesson but not benefit from it

How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is

Trifle with laws from above, with her own. (Exit.)



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The Merchant of Venice- Ac.2.Sc.7

Top aide of Trump:

O hell! what have we here?

I see none but Trouble spelled T-R-U-M-Pay

There is Oh vitriol! I’ll read the writing.



All that glitters is not gold;

Look at that thatch, it’s fool’s gold.

Many a man his hair has dyed

But this is real coxcomb’s hair:

But I cavil not at his thatch-

Pea-sized in girth do make grey matter

Run on and on to no avail.

Had he been as wise as his gold

What he speaks will make all glad.

Empty in thought, in speech rude,

His suit to the White House is doom’d.’


Top  aide of Trump:

Fare you well; your suit is cold.

Cold, indeed; and labour lost:

Scram then, beat it,- you said enow:

Hide your hulk in shame, saying:

Farewell, heat, and welcome, frost!




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(On 400 th anniversary of Shakespeare here is a parody. Macbeth: Ac1.Sc.4. Then of course Prince is also remembered. -benny)

Late Prince of Purple Rain! That is steep

One song I could belt out in falsetto

While he’s dust and ashes. Stars stop your ears

I dare not sing my black and deep desires.

You may clap at the end, -yea let that be

I will take that I outdid Prince

While he’s dust and ashes. Stars hide your fires

If my words suck, -my heart was not in it;

The eye wink at the hand while the question

Of dollars and cents make my words sound false.

The original version is given here below.



(aside) The prince of Cumberland! That is a step

On which I must fall down, or else o’erleap,

For in my way it lies. Stars, hide your fires;

Let not light see my black and deep desires.

The eye wink at the hand, yet let that be

Which the eye fears, when it is done, to see.

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(on receiving the Torture Report)

O, That this too too sordid mind would melt

With it what lapses it had allowed to creep-

Oh that the Senators had not pressed

The Torture Report be made public!Oh God! Oh God!

How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable,

Seem to me all the uses of this Hill!

Fie on’t! ah fie! ’tis an untended pig-sty,

That grows maggots; men rank and gross in nature

Possess it merely. That it should come to this!


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