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Posts Tagged ‘humorous sketch’

Whenever I look at the mirror on a grey Monday morning after a weekend binge I could crawl. The mirror of course lies. Retching and falling in drunken stupor was the night before. The mirror has had no way knowing my love with bottle. Yet when I pause before I lather I have a sneaking feeling it points an accusatory finger. I have shrunk several sizes.

The other day I was promoted over several others to the No.2 Position. When I walked past the cubicles of my former workmates, I looked at my reflection next to the cooler. I almost was blown over. I looked 10 feet tall. Till I meet my father-in law who is the numero uno. I flop instantly and have a whipped cur look. SometimesI think we human are really rubber ball or elastic that some unseen hand pull and bounce around.

My finances are nothing much but I look well heeled. Everytime  my wife palaver with women over some gala events,-it is a rehash of Real Beverly Hills housewives . Always I hear my take-home pay is grown astronomical. Whenever I mutter some cuss-words she has a laugh and tells, ” I just want to make the girls green with jealously.’ Between us we have a tacit agreement whenever she speaks of her age,- always two decades knocked out, I should keep a straight face. It is fine since a couple of drinks make me see nothing straight in the horizon nor anything in the drawing room.

Now after living through several avatars I am not sure it is plain lying or laziness to play by the cards on the table. I always have an ace up in my sleeve. Ever since in primary school I took a picture of Ronald Coleman and said it was the snapshot of my father. Unfortunately I was sitting in the class of a teacher who had played the same card before me.  He made me stand for the rest of the day holding a card LIAR. In fact I all along thought the teacher was asking me to remind him of his fib. You see my name by right is Billy Liar. It never connected. Not even this day.

Benny

 

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