Poems For the Solitary Hour-13.2

Prayer Before Birth

 

I am not yet born;O hear me.


Let not the bloodsucking bat or the rat or the stoat or the
club-footed ghoul come near me.

I am not yet born, console me.


I fear that the human race may with tall walls wall me,


with strong drugs dope me, with wise lies lure me,
on black racks rack me, in blood-baths roll me.


I am not yet born; provide me
With water to dandle me, grass to grow for me, trees to talk
to me, sky to sing to me, birds and a white light
in the back of my mind to guide me.


I am not yet born; forgive me
For the sins that in me the world shall commit, my words
when they speak me, my thoughts when they think me,
my treason engendered by traitors beyond me,
my life when they murder by means of my
hands, my death when they live me.

I am not yet born; rehearse me

In the parts I must play and the cues I must take when
old men lecture me, bureaucrats hector me, mountains
frown at me, lovers laugh at me, the white
waves call me to folly and the desert calls
me to doom and the beggar refuses
my gift and my children curse me.


I am not yet born; O hear me,


Let not the man who is beast or who thinks he is God
come near me.

I am not yet born; O fill me
With strength against those who would freeze my
humanity, would dragoon me into a lethal automaton,
would make me a cog in a machine, a thing with
one face, a thing, and against all those
 who would dissipate my entirety, would
 blow me like thistledown hither and
 thither or hither and thither 
like water held in the
hands would spill me.


Let them not make me a stone and let them not spill me.
Otherwise kill me.

Louis Macneice(1907-1963)

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An Encounter

She was called Sin. Who gave her such a name I cannot say. Was it her professional name she would not say for silver or for my abject surrender to her wish the whole day. My persuasive speech and silver was wasted on her. She came in her street clothes a voluptuous red head on whom any dress didn’t do justice. I meant to keep aloof and keep the encounter strictly business like. No perfect specimen of her kind had I ever seen or made love to. Having bought love by galore from the day I became a man I knew I was the boss.
I placed directly an envelope into her hands. I noticed the dimple in her elbow and I could not help thinking she was well upholstered. She smiled and laid aside the envelope unopened with neither hauteur not rancor. ‘I will demand my price after my service.’ The rodomontade of a whore was not in her speech. It was more of woman of pleasure who had whole time to give pleasure and transport her clientele to dimensions they never had an inkling of. She knew it and the luxuriousness of oohs and ahhs during our sport was that of woman who was born to give pleasure.
Pleasure she could give like a tap running on and on. I asked her name and she said: Sin. Much to my annoyance she never budged. Her body could writhe and roll and add to the pleasure but her inner spirit was like a barbed wire, cutting and tearing my human frailties that must seek pleasure and pay and go on paying,- and in the end feel left out in the cold. She was correct and Sin chose to be correct.
She stuck to our contract; it was sealed over a written contract sealed and delivered to her three days before the encounter. She would surrender her body totally for the price she deemed fit. I knew how high the price was but that nothing compared to the wound in my innermost being. It was a rvage I could not bear. I wanted to her carnally and the knowledge was all that mattered. By midnight as she parted she merely nipped my earlobe so only I could hear it. ‘Price is paid for.’
The strangest sensation was the early hours of the night. Sin was completely erased from my thoughts! I slept like a log and the love-making had sunk into some dark pool like a boulder and not for once I could recall it. She had completely disappeared from memory.
In my forties I married a girl from the village where my ancestral house even now stands. Meanwhile I had become a man with power and influence and I was the Big Boss to great many.
Marriage of the Big Boss was an event and how the townsfolk bent backwards to make the wedding a success. I knew the bride knew my position and my prestige. She was docile and on the wedding night I would do my duties. One thing led to another and she was all for me to take. But the image of Sin lay before me. Incredible it was! My hair all stood on ends and sweat beaded on my fore head. The bride asked if anything was the matter. The shadow of Sin lay between and the lips of my bride had taken on the snarl of a cougar. However much I tried she just didn’t go away. My bride was all for sleeping off. But it was a vain hope. Sin had come back and she was demanding payment.
One night I just sneaked out of the house and I had not the heart to face the woman I had married. Let her live with the illusions she was married into power and prestige. I had paid the price Sin demanded. Her image merely would not go away was the price I paid.
benny

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On Understanding God’s Will

“the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world”(Rev 13.8KJV)

Here we read God s  Will which was from the foundation of the world.  Also revealing that it is in context of names found in the book of life. As I mentioned in my post In My Sunday Best-3 Triune God puts His Will into operation. Imagination of God expresses  the Will concerning God the Son in the book of  Genesis. Thus God clothing Adam and Eve with the skins must be seen as unfolding of His Will in stages. Holy Spirit as the author of the Book of Life gathers material from the manner living beings, angels perform and it is put into a certain form.  The Bible is such a composition where the Three aspects of Godhead expresses.  So if only creation of Adam and Eve is described in the book it would not mean there were no nations on the earth.

There is another point as to the sin that Adam committed. Sin of disobedience. Did God know it beforehand? St.Paul says in one of his episles where there is no law there is no sin. Therefore in the imagination of God there was no sin  implied or attributed. Only when Adam broke a direct commandment the fall of man occurred. The Clean Slate principle prevents  man’s actions as controlling His Wisdom or Power. In other words the Absolute Value of Truth is unaffected. 

Notwithstanding what I have set down here is according to human understanding. It necessarily is not the final word. We  need to make our assumptions and draw conclusions with a caveat ‘we could be wrong .”

benny 

benny

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In My Sunday Best-2

Gen 4:3-6 2 Ti 3:16-17

In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the LORD. 4 But Abel brought fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The LORD looked with favor on Abel and his offering, 5 but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast.

6 Then the LORD said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? 7 If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it.”

How should one read the Scriptures?

With our rational mind of course. We are humans and as such if my understanding can not follow it rationally I am likely to go wrong. is it not? Rasputin the mad monk of Tsarist Russia belonged to a sect that held on literally to the Romans vs.1 Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? He committed sin on the basis of the Pauline verse. He indulged in orgy so God’s grace may abound. He sinned so he may find grace! He made Grace as a medium for cleaning up his lust for flesh. Did it cure him? No he died of it.

Take this verse:

And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell (Matt 18:9)Even though blind cannot one sin?

I cited these extreme examples to show there are areas where literal interpretation or common sense cannot do work properly. In interpreting Bible especially.

As a Christian I believe the Scriptures is God breathed. If I accept the account of Genesis where God breathed into man what am to infer? I have that spirit, is it not? Spirit of man can be understood by man and things of God are better understood and followed through by His spirit. If I try to understand by the spirit of man I do not think the Bible would have held much interest to me. Instead the Book has been a source of great delight to me and many passages have on several occasions served me in the manner these were meant to do: teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness(2Ti 3:17). It has taught me in the past when I was more likely to go wrong and also prevented me at times from following certain course of action. The third aspect of training is what I expect- and it is for my lifetime, so my life may not be drawn off the rails when I least expect it. Samson was confident of his strength but he found he had become like any other when the Philistines came upon him. There are such instances I could learn from. Even so there are great areas I cannot make sense literally or spiritually. I leave these aside since there are enough lessons my life in flesh can learn. So I do not dismiss the book as of no meaning.

The story of Cain and Abel is a story and it can be understood at different levels. The moral of the story is plain as day and it is provided in the vs 7. Considering that Jesus refers to it Mt.23:35 it must have held certain significance to him. Abel is qualified as righteous because he pleased God with his sacrifice. God found favor with his offering while He did not favor that of Cain.Cannot God exercise free will that we often appropriate for ourselves to justify our actions? The consequence of God’s preference outs Cain’s nature. He murdered Abel stealthily.

God is Spirit.It is spirit of foreknowledge that Simon Peter could use when he identified correctly who Jesus was.

16Simon Peter answered, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” 17Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven.(Matt 16:17)

We have that spirit of God and it is what keeps us falling into the hands of the Evil One. The Scriptures being God inspired we grow in His knowledge by correctly handling the Word.

Since the Scriptures is to be understood spiritually let me see what the story of Cain and Abel teaches us. God clothed man with skins since he felt shame in his nakedness. I think this act prefigures the atoning work of Jesus. Abel must have spiritually discerned how to find favor with God.

In trying to understand the Bible I find certain helpful tips. I find St. Paul’s instruction to Timothy very useful. Of this I shall come back by and by.

While studying a text ask yourself:

Does this passage belong in spirit with rest of the Bible? From the selected text of Cain and Abel let me point out the following;

Abel’s offer of fat portions from his flock echoes in the sacrifice of OT priests. God clothing Adam and Eve with skins also bear the truth in the Pauline epistle: without shedding of blood there is no remission or redemption.

Does the passage teach some needful or useful lesson?

Does it rebuke some trait that you have carelessly allowed to remain? Such a trait could be standing in your relationship with God and man.

This means you need to read the Bible in the right spirit and meditate over the passage. After all the main thing is how you may get the best out of your reading. If you handle the word of God correctly, as Paul writes to Timothy you are being trained in righteousness.

Benny

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Dekalog-1988

Is decalogue relevant in this time and age? In the ten part series Dekalog, Krzysztof Kieslowski examines the dilemma of fundamental sin in the lives of ordinary Warsaw citizens. Note the geographical microcosm where the episodes take place. Poland with its checkered history under oppressive regimes one after the other, has always been a staunch support for the Church be it of Catholic or Hebraic persuasion. The Ten Commandments refer to the relationship between man and God and sin being as clear as any disruption in the above equation. Dekalog has a strong storyline and characters well fleshed out and is often brilliant but uneven, which however should not deter us from considering the film as a masterpiece.  The episodes were meant for TV.

The first of Kieslowski’s 10-part series, Dekalog 1
“I Am the Lord God”,
Krzysztof (Henryk Baranowski) is a scientist who puts his faith in science and logic to govern daily life (Decalogue I). He brings up his young son Pawel (Wojciech Klata) in an apartment block flat. In the absence of a mother their home is dedicated to technology: on assorted computers they can plot out their lives, perform calculations and even, thanks to Pawel, control appliances around the apartment. He has long since lapsed as a Catholic. Pawel has a female role-model in his aunt Irena (Maja Komorowska. For a 11 year old Pawel life and its spiritual meaning is of no interest. Life is wonderful as long as he’s able to go skating.
His Christmas present is a new pair of ice skates and, as the ice looks thick, Pawel’s keen to try them out.  One evening the boy does not return home.
The loss of a child is always devastating but given the age and the potential of such a boy with so much in him to flower we can feel the waste and tragedy and it is in the generation of these emotions that Dekalog 1 succeeds. In such poignancy of futlity and despair how strong are analytical methods and reasons, or what we call a scientific temper?
benny

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